


100

by dralexreid



Series: Dr Piper Bishop [40]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Blood and Violence, Character Death, F/M, Gun Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:55:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27071596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dralexreid/pseuds/dralexreid
Summary: An enemy waits and watches his nemesis deteriorate emotionally with a fractured family. The BAU works harder than ever to take him down, but the bureaucratic response seems determined to nail someone for the violent aftermath.
Relationships: Dr Spencer Reid/Dr Piper Bishop
Series: Dr Piper Bishop [40]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1972852
Kudos: 16





	1. Chapter 1

“Will you please state your name and rank for the record?” Erin Strauss paced the room, a file open in her hand.

“My name is Senior Supervisory Agent Jennifer Jareau, Communications Liaison with the Behavioural Analysis Unit in Quantico, Virginia.” JJ leaned back in her chair, swiping the bangs out of her eyes.

“And how long have you been working with the BAU?”

“6 years.”

“And have you worked under Agent Hotchner the entire time?”

“No, ma'am. I currently report to Acting Unit Chief Derek Morgan.”

“Who took over the unit because Agent Hotchner's ability to lead the team had become compromised,” the superintendent supplied. JJ sat up straighter in her seat.

“I–I don't believe that's the reason.”

“You have a different opinion?”

“It's not just an opinion,” JJ said, keeping her voice even.

“You have a different understanding?”

“SSA Hotchner voluntarily stepped down so we could continue to do our jobs unhindered,” she answered calmly

“How would you describe Agent Hotchner's recent behaviour?”

“Driven.”

“Driven. Agent Jareau, your entire team is on the line if I cannot reconcile an adequate account of Agent Hotchner's investigation into George Foyet.”

We were all investigating The Reaper. SSA Hotchner was not the only one, especially after he sent us that calling card. The newspaper articles he mailed to Karl Arnold. 2 letters from 2 different locations. They ramped us all back up again.” JJ felt her argument slipping. “I should just start at the beginning. Foyet had done a lot of injury to himself in the original string of killings, in an effort to paint himself as a victim and throw us off the investigation. As a result, he became dependent upon a large number of extremely strong medications. We'd been searching the country for patients with that exact prescription combination, but we hadn't had any luck.”

JJ recounted how she’d deduced that perhaps Foyet wasn’t using an exact prescription, relying on over-the-counter measures instead after a trip to the pharmacy with William LaMontagne Jr, her current partner, and her son. She recalled her directions to Agent Anderson after he’d informed her that Foyet’s envelopes were clean to ‘drive to the postmaster general’s office if that was what it took’. He’d returned not half an hour later with two addresses, claiming he wasn’t just a pretty face. Erin thanked JJ for her aid and dismissed her, asking for Penelope Garcia. After going through the formalities, she noticed the nervous but fatigued expression on the tech analyst’s face.

“Are you all right?”

“I—I'm just not, uh, comfortable with any of this.” Penelope tried to speak simply. “It's not ok.”

“What do you mean?”

“In my opinion? Everyone is asking the wrong questions. Doesn't anybody care about what the Reaper did to them, how many people he hurt? All anyone seems to care about is...” Her voice hitched, eyes welling up with tears. “This just isn't right.”

“Do you think that Agent Hotchner was acting... Agitated or unreasonable?”

“He... No, no, he—He was freaked out about his family. Which, considering what happened, I'd say was perfectly reasonable.”

“When did SSA Hotchner include you in the investigation?”

“He- He needed me to track down any prescription drugs that couldn’t be replicated with over-the-counter meds. Kevin, um, FBI Analyst Kevin Lynch was helping me narrow the search down.” Penelope cleared her throat. “He helped us figure out that Foyet needed Tapazole and he wouldn’t be able to emulate it with anything else. That’s when we printed out a list of everyone on the prescription within a 60-mile of both Fredericksburg and Westminster. The team started isolating the names.”

Feeling as though Penelope had reached her breaking point, Erin dismissed her, calling in Piper next. She was significantly calmer, Erin noted, as Piper took her seat. “Please state your name and rank for the record.”

“Dr Piper Bishop, Senior Supervisory Agent for the Behavioural Analysis Unit, Quantico, Virginia,” Piper recited just like JJ had told her.

“You were originally a consultant for the team, yes?”

“Yes, ma’am. SSA Gideon and Hotchner appointed me as a consultant until I received formal training.”

“And you’ve been working here how long?”

“3 years, now.” Piper never broke eye contact, as though challenging Erin to try and depose Hotch.

“I’m not your enemy, Dr Bishop,” Erin offered, but her contact never wavered.

“Blind belief in authority is the greatest enemy of truth,” Piper quoted. “Forgive me if I don’t completely trust you yet, Agent Strauss, but I trust you to do what’s right when all of this is over. And I hope you trust me to tell you the truth.”

“How did you find Foyet’s address?”

“It’s remarkable what you get when you put together 7 intellectuals in the same room. SSA Morgan realised that Foyet was smart enough to use a pseudonym and while he assumed the easiest was to steal someone’s identity, SSA Prentiss believed he would use a name connected with the case. We were about to cross-reference the list with all the names from the case file until Dr Reid realised that he may be using an anagram.”

“And how did he realise that?” Piper scoffed, the first lapse into emotion Erin had seen the whole interview.

“Foyet is addicted to symbolism. The eye of providence on the letters, symbolising that he was still there, watching, waiting for SSA Hotchner to break down and give up. That’s when we found the anagram. Peter Rhea in Arlington.”

“That will be all. Please send Agent Rossi in as you leave.”

“Yes ma’am.” Piper made to leave until Erin called her again.

“Who said that? The quote you referenced.”

“Einstein.” Piper flashed her a cold smile before leaving the room.

* * *

Erin sighed as she waited for Rossi to look up from his phone and answer her question. “David, I asked you a question,” she reminded him.

“Hmmm?”

“Once the team located George Foyet's potential apartment, why didn't the BAU enter immediately?” Rossi looked up at the supervisor.

“Gold is still going up,” he answered, “but knowing when to get out, that’s the trick.” Erin rubbed her temples and moved to stop the recording.

“What are you doing?”

“What's the point of all this, Erin?” Rossi straightened as he asked her. “Why?”

“So that this never happens again.”

“There is nothing a bureaucrat can do to make sure that something like this never happens again.”

“So, we just wait for the next bloodbath?” She turned the recorder on again before repeating the question. “Why did you wait so long before going to Foyet's apartment?”

“We had to be sure he was there. If we went in and he wasn't, he would know we found him. Of course, the longer we waited, the more time he had to...” He hesitated, unable to say the next words. “It was an impossible decision.”

“So, who made it? Agent Hotchner?” Erin leaned forward onto her elbows, her chin resting gently on her hands.

“No,” he challenged. “He gave that call to Morgan and that kid made the best call he could. But by the time we got in, Foyet had disappeared and we knew he’d go after someone. Garcia found an internet alarm on the name Peter Rhea. It alerted him as soon as we ran a check on it.”

“The report says that’s when your technical analyst found the surveillance footage of Agent Hotchner’s family. What was his reaction?”

“What would yours be? He used to be a litigator, he knew what the process was, he followed it, Erin. He called the Marshal in charge. We made the right ca-”

“That’s not for you to decide, David. Thank you, that will be all.”

* * *

Erin waited patiently for Dr Reid to take his seat, his cane resting gently against his seat. “You left for Marshal Kassmeyer's house immediately?”

“Yes, ma'am.” Spencer watched the woman pace, feeling no empathy for her. He remembered the frustrations spreading outside in the bullpen. JJ had been pacing just like the woman in front of him. Emily had been biting on her fingernails. Rossi had taken up post next to the coffee machine. Derek had been more worried about Penelope who hadn’t said a word since her interview and Piper had been trying to act nonchalant about the whole incident, playing up a charade of the whole interview process being a distraction to her, pretending as though she just wanted to do her paperwork. But he knew that as soon as her familiar walls were back up, she would shatter. But who could blame her? Who could blame any of them? The case had just been that bad.

“Wouldn't this be a job for a tactical team?” Erin prompted him.

“We felt that it would take too much time to get authorization for another operation.” Spencer’s voice was even and calm.

“We? Don't you mean Agent Hotchner wanted that?”

“No, I mean all of us wanted that. I know what you're thinking, and I agree it would be easy for us to blame him.”

“Easy?” The woman stopped, intrigued by this lanky doctor’s calm anger.

“Yeah. Why not just say it's his fault and then we can all just forget about it? But, uh, the problem is, I have an eidetic memory, and that's not what happened.” He spoke placidly, almost lazy but inside his anger was at a boiling point. “We found Marshal Kassmeyer fatally wounded, gunshot wounds to each leg, one foot. He was missing several fingers, and appeared to have been badly beaten, no doubt by Foyet.” Erin appeared disgusted and rightly so, Spencer noted. She deserved to know the things they were forced to see every day.

“Do you believe it was Marshal Kassmeyer's fault that Agent Hotchner's family was compromised?”

“Absolutely not.”

“You answered that very quickly.”

“When you're being tortured, there's no end in sight, except giving them what they want.”

“And Kassmeyer didn't do that?”

“He withstood everything that Foyet had. And in the end, it didn’t matter. Foyet went into every single contact Kassmeyer had. When he finally found…” Spencer swallowed the large lump in his throat, wishing now, more than ever, that he had his family with him instead of out there. “He found her number and pretended to be another Marshal. And she trusted him.”

* * *

“I don’t understand,” Rossi asked Piper as she paced, his gaze catching Spencer limping back from his interview. “She already finished with you. Why does she want you in there again?” Tension lined her forehead as she chewed her bottom lip.

“What’s happening?” Piper turned around from her conversation with Rossi to see Spencer leaning on his cane gently.

“Strauss want to re-interview Piper,” Rossi informed him.

“What for? I thought she was done with you?”

“I’m one of the newest members on the team, least susceptible to inter-team loyalties. She thinks I’d be willing to betray the team for my job.”

“Well, she’s a poor profiler then,” Derek joked, putting Piper at ease as he sipped his coffee. Piper flashed him a weak smile.

“I should go, seeing as she’s done with Spencer. Don’t wanna risk my job,” she scoffed.

“I’ll drop you off,” Spencer offered but Piper brushed him off.

“I know my way,” she said before walking away and Spencer retracted his outstretched hand, meeting Emily’s eyes as she rushed after her.

“Don’t take it personally, kid. She’s just stressed out.” Spencer nodded, his eyes still fixed as Piper turned the corner with Emily.

* * *

"Don't pretend it doesn't make sense. I'm lucky to be here, Em. Obviously, I'm the weak link."

"You are not," Emily tried to convince Piper as they walked. "You'd never betray Hotch."

"Not willingly. There's a reason she wants me back in there. She may be a bureaucrat, but she knows how to do her job. Do you honestly trust that I wouldn't give up things for this job?" Piper stopped walking abruptly, her eyes hardening like steel as she met Emily's dark eyes, gauging a response. Emily visibly hesitated and Piper received her answer, non-verbal though it may be. She made her way back up to the interview room. She settled into her seat and Erin leant against the back of her chair.

"Do you believe Agent Hotchner acted reasonably after Foyet killed Marshal Kassmeyer?" Piper looked at her, all attempts at neutrality abandoned.

"I'm sorry?"

"Did Agent Hotchner act reasonably after George Foyet attacked Marshal Sam Kassmeyer?" The right thing to do, she noted afterwards, would have been to take a deep breath and give a rational opinion. Unfortunately, that notion came to her at the wrong time.

"Considering the circumstances, absolutely," Piper spat, rising in her seat. "Foyet not only assaulted a Marshal but he impersonated a Marshal, deceived a woman under their protection, endangered a minor in her custody and told a woman her ex-husband was dead." Piper's eyes never wavered from Erin's. "And despite all of that, Agent Hotchner, in my professional opinion, acted remarkably." Erin was silent, a little stunned. "And personally," she continued, "I'd like to know what a more appropriate course of action was."

"Why was Agent Hotchner on his own?"

"He followed Marshal Kassmeyer to get answers. It would've been a waste to have two agents doing a job one man could do on his own and Sam needed medical help. Someone had to go, Agent Hotchner volunteered."

“Agent Hotchner was looking for an opportunity to separate himself from the team and he found one,” Erin demanded.

“That's not true,” Piper maintained.

“He was desperate and he didn't want someone with a clear head to stop him.” Piper licked her lips, becoming exasperated.

"I understand that you want a quick and easy narrative, but if you think Hotch intended to..." Piper hesitated, keeping herself in check. "If Agent Hotchner did have some secret agenda as you are so keen to allege," Piper said evenly, "then he wouldn't have bothered calling us. He wouldn't have bothered trying to talk down Foyet as he raced to save 2 innocent civilians. He did nothing anyone else more qualified wouldn't have done."

* * *

Emily picked at her nails as she waited outside the conference room. Piper was getting grilled again, everyone was on edge and she was next. Eventually, Piper came out, maintaining her cold, quiet facade. "Your turn."

"Is everything-"

"I didn't say anything you wouldn't have said." She gave her friend a quick hug of comfort. "You've got this." Emily heard Piper walk away and entered the room herself. 

"Tell me what happened when Agent Hotchner called George Foyet," Erin asked the young agent in front of her, ignoring the incessant tapping of her boots.

"He approached it like any other case. He knew two innocents were in danger. He attempted to contact the subject in order to sway Foyet. We profiled him to be a narcissist and a manipulator, a man who has to be both recognised and in control. Agent Hotchner appealed to that. He tried to convince Foyet that he didn't need to kill Haley and Jack."

"And did he?"

"No, ma'am."

"What happened instead?" Erin's prompt elicited hesitation and Emily's eye contact wavered.

"Foyet practically told Agent Hotchner that he was within observable proximity to Haley's location, to the extent with which he called Haley Brooks, impersonated a Marshal and asked her to let him in."

"And Agent Hotchner heard this conversation?"

"Yes."

"Very well. That will be all. Thank you."

* * *

Derek was solemn, wearing a simple black button-up and matching tie, the gravity of what he'd seen weighing on his soul. 

"And at this point, you still didn't know where Foyet was?" Erin prompted him, still not fully able to wake him from his reverie.

"The phone belonged to a US Marshal. It was designed to bounce between towers, so we could not pinpoint his location."

"And Agent Hotchner was driving around aimlessly," she said in disbelief.

"No. He wasn't. We had Foyet's profile, and we knew if we followed it, we would know were he took Hotch's family."

"Yes, yes, the need for control and narcissism but-"

"The profile," Derek interrupted, "meant Foyet would want Hotch to find him, to see what..." He paused. "What he would to her. We realised that he must have given Hotch a clue, something that told Hotch where to go. When SSA Jareau pointed out that Foyet wasn't in New Jersey, we realised that Foyet would pick somewhere with the biggest emotional impact on Hotch."

"Which would be the house they lived in together," Erin supplied. "So, what was your strategy from there?"

"Hotch was driving in from the hospital with a head start but we were still ten minutes away. We had a tactical deployment team but they would've taken at least 10 minutes to arrive. Bishop would've gotten there in half the time. But it..." His voice was barely above a whisper. "It still wasn't enough."

"Even though Agent Hotchner was on speaker with Foyet the entire time."

"Nothing he said could have convinced Foyet. He was determined to kill them."

"And what happened after the first gunshot?"

"Hotch arrived first and from my understanding of what happened, he breached the house alone and he found tracks of blood leading to..." Derek took a deep breath. "Leading to her body. He thought he saw Foyet behind a curtain and shot at him multiple times."

"And the team wasn't there yet?"

"No. Our SUV took longer than it should have but Piper got there in time."

"And what was Dr Bishop doing?" Erin prompted and Derek's features broke from the neutral expression he'd been holding thus far.

"What she was trained to do. She took the perimeter and when she heard the gunshots, she radioed in and breached the house from the back, clearing the house floor by floor."

"While Hotch and Foyet were still fighting?"

"Bishop wasn't trained to take him on and her priority was finding Jack and protecting him. We'd all heard the gunshot, we knew Haley had been..." His voice became uneven. "The priority was Jack."

"So Bishop and Hotch were never in the same room?"

"No, ma'am. They had different priorities and as I understand it, Hotch was engaging Foyet to keep him from searching for Jack."

"He didn't know that-"

"Ma'am, we had no evidence that Foyet had killed Jack. Just that we hadn't heard a second gunshot," he interrupted her, "and when Foyet mocked Hotch, he confirmed Jack was still alive." Erin took her seat.

"SSA Derek Morgan, when you and your team entered the house, did you know that Dr Bishop had found Jack before Agent Hotchner-?"

"Yes, ma'am. She had secured Jack and had kept him hidden in Hotch's office."

"That will be all."

* * *

It was dark when Morgan found the others still in the bullpen. Piper was tapping her fingers on her desk. Spencer had been reading the same page for 5 minutes. Emily was squeezing a stress ball so hard he thought it would pop. JJ was perched on his desk next to Penelope whose eyes had gone puffy, her nose twinging red. Rossi was right behind her, a hand resting gently on her shoulder. JJ spoke first.

"Hotch has to face the panel in 20 minutes." Derek just nodded, that was all he managed to do before following their gaze to the glass doors, watching their boss enter, a hand tightly around his young son's, letting go only when Jack recognised 'Uncle Spencer' and 'Aunt Piper'. He was so young, Derek noticed as Jack ran towards the agents, so young that he would probably forget. Piper's behaviour changed instantly, as she knelt down in front of him to give him a quick high-five before prompting him to jump on her shoulders and telling him to 'wave at Daddy' as she took him inside so the others could talk more freely. But Hotch didn't say much, only that the funeral was in the evening the next day and that he and Jack would appreciate it if they'd all come, as though it would have been a burden to them. The agents watched him leave, knowing that this was all too soon.

* * *

"There was nothing I could do for her," he managed, at the end of his story. "She was already..." He couldn't say it, the notion of someone so precious, so inherently untainted, being lost to a place he couldn't follow was too much to encapsulate in one word.

"She died fairly quickly," Erin spoke softly, hoping they would soothe an unsoothable wound, an incurable disease. Loss. "One of the wounds severed her aorta, and they don't think that she..." Erin hesitated. "And they don't think she suffered much," she said, taking off her glasses and pushing her files to the side. "Agent Hotchner, what do you think would have happened If George Foyet had gotten up from that floor? If you didn't kill him?"

"I don't have to think," he said honestly. "I know he would have tried to kill my son, too."

"That's good enough for me. Any questions?" Erin practically challenged her fellow panellists after having turned the recording off, meeting only silence and shaking heads. She waited for the others to leave before addressing her old friend. "Agent Hotchner. I'm so sorry for your loss. And... If you or your son need anything..."

"Thank you." Aaron closed the door behind him, making his way slowly to their briefing room. The scene he found as he walked in was starkly different from what he'd usually walk into. Instead of the mangled bodies and nightmare-inducing crimes, he found a heartwarming sight. He found Jack perched easily on Rossi's knee, candy in his arms, no doubt from his doting Aunt Penelope, playing with toys that JJ had retrieved from somewhere, his hair being ruffled by his Uncle Derek. The profiler in him easily figured out that Piper's beratement of Spencer was obviously a sign that he had overestimated himself once again by attempting to balance Jack on his own knee despite her usual vigilance. But he missed the fond look they all gave him as Jack sprinted from Rossi to Hotch's arms.


	2. Promises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Piper and Spencer reflect on the aftermath of the Hotchner Tragedy.

Piper and Spencer were the last to leave the building. That was, of course, apart from Anderson. Piper had no idea how he logged so many hours but she was thankful he did. The two stood further apart than usual and their conversation had been just as limited. Despite what everyone believed, Spencer knew that Strauss had rattled Piper because though she'd shown off about how she'd irritated the woman, she hadn't said a word about it to him. He wasn't quite sure how to break the tension in the elevator as they descended, but if he didn't speak now, she'd be silent to whole drive home and as always, his thoughts spiralled. Asking her to dinner would be too inappropriate and would involve much more conversation that neither of them was up for. Asking her to stay over would be presumptuous and still inappropriate in the current context. Perhaps he should...

"Do you mind if I stay over tonight?" Her question was direct and his inner profiler noted how she refused to make eye contact, preferring to stare at the metal doors instead. _She thinks I would say no._ Stammering, he said yes and she flashed him a small smile as she ran a hand through her hair. Her pace matched his as they walked to her bike in silence.

Stubbornly, she kept her facade up even as they entered his apartment. "Isn't it slightly impractical," she started, "for Hotch to have lived in Fairfax County? I mean it's 42 minutes from Quantico." Piper released her hair from the clip it was in, sweeping it up into a ponytail as she started to clear up the apartment. Spencer didn't answer. "He was always at work before me though, when I started." She barked out a laugh, not her usual musical laugh though, Spencer noticed as she folded up one of his cardigans. "You know, I was so nervous when I started that I started coming in at 7 in the morning, doing absolutely nothing for an hour because you all would start showing up at 8. The only people there were Gideon and Hotch." She still wouldn't make eye contact with him as she moved to clear up his bookshelf. "And I always felt uncomfortable around both of them. Until I realised Gideon just had a hard shell. Especially when it came to you," she murmured. "Even Hotch." Her voice was getting quieter and quieter until she cleared her throat. Spencer knew he should intervene at some point, that she had to deal with her emotions, just like he would have to. "You remember that birthday party when Hotch invited us over? God, I was so nervous. I mean if it wasn't for Emily, I definitely would've spilled something." He remembered that night. It was before Hotch and Haley had separated. Her 35th birthday. "Jack was so little and adorable in his dinner suit and he hated it so much." She'd moved from the bookshelf to his desk, placing his scattered pens in their holders. "I told him all about James Bond and the whole party he was running around with his finger gun." She grinned at the memory. He remembered it too, how she'd escaped from the party into the yard with a glass of champagne, how amazing she'd looked in her deep blue dress and how he would've gone to her too if he had the courage, but Jack had run away from Haley to the yard. He remembered how Piper had smiled the first time all evening as she knelt down to Jack and straightened his tie. He'd run in and pretended to protect Haley from Derek and they'd all laughed fondly. "Hotch was wearing the same suit jacket from work, he'd just changed his shirt. And Haley..." Piper's voice cracked and she almost dropped his favourite mug.

"Piper..."

"God, I'm sorry," she spoke rapidly as she settled the mug carefully on the table. "I almost dropped it. Christ, this isn't a good day," she chuckled wryly as she stared at the mug. He moved over to her side.

"Piper, you-"

"I know, I'm sorry. I screwed up," she murmured, her gaze still trained on the mug. "I screwed up. I should've been faster. I should've figured it out sooner." Spencer kept his grip on his cane as he ran a hand up her arm gently.

"You can't blame yourself."

"No, I can. I screwed up, Spence. I messed up. I should've-"

"You protected Jack. There was nothing you could've-"

"No, I should've-"

"What, killed Foyet yourself? You wouldn't have been able to live with yourself."

"Fine, then. So I wouldn't have slept right. I shouldn't have forced Hotch to-" He lifted her chin, forcing her to make eye contact.

"Piper, you didn't do anything wrong." Spencer's voice was clear but delicate as he saw her eyes start to well up.

"Then why?" She asked him quietly. "Why him? Why Haley?" He dropped an arm only to wrap it around her waist. He didn't need to tell her that tragedies happened, that no matter how fast they run, there's no controlling tragedy. And yet there they stood, in his apartment, her sobbing into his shoulder. He had no words of his own, the only solace he had to offer was warmth and poetry.

"To weep is to make less the depth of grief," he quoted and he felt her laugh before she pulled away from him to drop a kiss on his cheek. She smiled at him, tired but real. 

"King Henry..." she thought about it for a moment. "VI?"

"Part 3," he supplied with a chuckle. She took a deep breath, nodding slowly. "You wanna order in?" She laughed again.

"Read my mind. Kung pao chicken?" She reached inside her pocket for her phone. He watched her walk away to put in their order and wondered whether it was okay that he didn't feel as bad as she did. He waited till she ended the call before he asked, reaching for her hand and pulling her to the couch. 

"Pipes, what if..." His thoughts were running wild as he held her hands on the couch, trying to ignore the perplexed expression on her face, terrified. "What if I don't feel," he spoke slowly and saw her confusion ease, still struggling to get the words out. "What if I don't feel as bad as I should?" A pregnant silence filled the air. "It's okay if-" Piper just held a hand out, her expression fierce.

"There is no rule," she said, keeping her voice even and pointed. "No equation, no formula that explains grief."

"Well, actually-"

"No. People have tried to explain using chemicals and hormones and other scientific bullshit." She pressed a hand to his chest. "But you feel things in here. There's no point trying to label it. You'll only drive yourself crazy." Her face softened as her hand moved to his cheek. "You can't rationalise this, love. You can only feel. And whatever you feel is a part of it. Happy that we saved Jack. Guilty because we couldn't save Haley. Angry that we can't do more for Hotch." She paused, gazing into his eyes, hoping he understood. "Promise me," she whispered, "promise me you won't overthink this." He nodded and turned to kiss the inside of her wrist.

"Promise."


End file.
